The Thing Is - Ellen Bass
The thing is...
to love life, to love it even
when you have no stomach for it
and everything you've held dear
crumbles like burnt paper in your hands,
your throat filled with the silt of it.
When grief sits with you, its tropical heat
thickening the air, heavy as water
more fit for gills than lungs;
when grief weights you like your own flesh
only more of it, an obesity of grief,
you think, How can a body withstand this?
Then you hold life like a face
between your palms, a plain face,
no charming smile, no violet eyes,
and you say, yes, I will take you
I will love you, again.
this is me procrastinating. I admit, I procrastinate with the worst of them. I drew a map of the world in one night for my human geography class one time.
if I say so myself, and I do, I am actually really great at working well under pressure. I capitalize on my time, get organized, and get down to business (just like those Huns). These skills are going to make me a great surgeon one day, I am sure of it. I have skilled hands and I don't panic when things turn for the worse and I make executive decisions and I am confident. But if I want to pass college without spending $500 on energy drinks, things have got to change! I anticipate that I will be pulling an all-nighter tonight. Why? Well, there were these modules for my international health class that I read, but I skipped the testing part. So I have to re-read them because I've forgotten the information. Each one takes about 2 hours...and I need six. By tomorrow. Not only that, I have a french exam that I haven't even started studying for. As well as a chemistry exam. It's tricky stuff, this procrastination business. No matter how much I plan ahead, I cannot force myself to do things until they're due! It's a problem. It's going to catch up with me and bite me in the butt one day. Unfortunately, until then, I will keep on procrastinating...
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